The Hubby told me tonight that his boss announced her pregnancy today.
Okay. I'm happy for her. I've never met her, but from what The Hubby says, she seems like a really nice person.
The Hubby says he wasn't sure if he should tell me because "you know how you get."
Yeah, I do. I don't mean to, but other people being pregnant while we keep trying and trying stings. Doesn't mean I'm not happy for them, but it stings. Sorry. I'm human - or a hormonal woman dealing with infertility. Whatever.
But, I didn't know his boss's situation. For all I knew, she had been struggling too. But, either way, good for her.
Then, he tells me the rest. After she announced it, she looked at The Hubby and said "Don't worry. It'll happen when God wants it to."
Why? Just why?
Why the hell do people feel the need to say that?
But, wait, it gets better.
She also said they were not trying at all, so this changes a lot of things.
Awesome. Makes the "It'll happen when God wants it to" statement SO much better.
I sound like a broken record, but I really do believe it will happen when God wants it to. But, when someone else says it, all it makes me feel is that they are saying God doesn't want me to have a baby now. And, to further that, they are saying that God thinks it is better timing for the teenager whose boyfriend slept with her and dumped her than it is for me and my husband who are married, with stable jobs and a home.
And what pisses me off even more is The Hubby just agrees. He so does not get IF. And he makes me feel like I'm a crazy person for wanting it so badly and for not wanting to hear those comments or for it hurting to watch my mom discuss pregnancy with my cousin instead of me, her own daughter.
It makes me want to scream, which of course, makes me seem like more of a crazy person. And, you know, sometimes I feel like a crazy person. I wonder what is wrong with me that I want this so much and get so upset and frustrated. Shouldn't I be able to deal with it better than this? Shouldn't I just be able to move on and accept things? Do people think that about me behind my back? If my own husband feels that way, what do others think?
I hate that things like this upset me. What this woman said was not said in malice. It was said to comfort, to give hope.
But it does just the opposite for me.
Maybe I am just a crazy person.
Okay. I'm happy for her. I've never met her, but from what The Hubby says, she seems like a really nice person.
The Hubby says he wasn't sure if he should tell me because "you know how you get."
Yeah, I do. I don't mean to, but other people being pregnant while we keep trying and trying stings. Doesn't mean I'm not happy for them, but it stings. Sorry. I'm human - or a hormonal woman dealing with infertility. Whatever.
But, I didn't know his boss's situation. For all I knew, she had been struggling too. But, either way, good for her.
Then, he tells me the rest. After she announced it, she looked at The Hubby and said "Don't worry. It'll happen when God wants it to."
Why? Just why?
Why the hell do people feel the need to say that?
But, wait, it gets better.
She also said they were not trying at all, so this changes a lot of things.
Awesome. Makes the "It'll happen when God wants it to" statement SO much better.
I sound like a broken record, but I really do believe it will happen when God wants it to. But, when someone else says it, all it makes me feel is that they are saying God doesn't want me to have a baby now. And, to further that, they are saying that God thinks it is better timing for the teenager whose boyfriend slept with her and dumped her than it is for me and my husband who are married, with stable jobs and a home.
And what pisses me off even more is The Hubby just agrees. He so does not get IF. And he makes me feel like I'm a crazy person for wanting it so badly and for not wanting to hear those comments or for it hurting to watch my mom discuss pregnancy with my cousin instead of me, her own daughter.
It makes me want to scream, which of course, makes me seem like more of a crazy person. And, you know, sometimes I feel like a crazy person. I wonder what is wrong with me that I want this so much and get so upset and frustrated. Shouldn't I be able to deal with it better than this? Shouldn't I just be able to move on and accept things? Do people think that about me behind my back? If my own husband feels that way, what do others think?
I hate that things like this upset me. What this woman said was not said in malice. It was said to comfort, to give hope.
But it does just the opposite for me.
Maybe I am just a crazy person.
1 comment:
You. Are. Not. A. Crazy. Person. There's really nothing anyone can say to make this right or better, but always remember this: You. Are. Not. A. Crazy. Person.
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