Monday, April 25, 2011

Thank You, Universe (No, really)

I know lots of ladies who have taken breaks in their TTC journey for one reason or another. I've never really considered doing that because I've never felt I had a reason--i.e., no even to plan around, etc.--or felt like I could afford the time. I've never felt the pressure enough to TTA for a cycle to give myself a break--the most I did was lay off charting.

As it turns out, maybe the universe knew better.

Although we were not TTA or taking a break, this last cycle was just that. Timing just did not work out and with all the testing, I just never felt like putting more pressure on ourselves to make sure we got it done. We still had a shot with our only day of sex being two days before ovulation, but I knew from the get-go that we were out.

My 2ww was much calmer. I've started to question phantom symptoms because I didn't have a single one (that is for another post). I actually temp'ed the entire 2ww, which I have not done in quite a few cycles, because I didn't feel like anything was hanging on each and every temp.

And I didn't have the big let down. I was so nice and such a change to not feel the extreme disappointment. And I even had a few reasons to wonder if bad timing worked for us. I went the distance again on my LP--all the way to 15DPO before my period showed (and later in the day, at that!), not even any spotting beforehand. My temp even went up at 14DPO. I had decided to test on Saturday morning (15DPO) no matter which was my temp went that morning. I had two events that day where drinking would be involved, so I felt like I needed to have that confirmed BFN to drink without worry if my period did not show first thing in the morning. Temp dropped big time, but I tested anyway.

BFN.

Not even a hint of tears.

Later in the day, the bitch finally showed.

You know what? Still no tears.

And I had an awesome day. I had fun girl time with friends, I did some shopping, and then had an evening out with The Hubby and friends--and wine.

And CD2? With the exception of cramps from hell, also great. I was energized and happy and hopeful.

Thank you, universe, for knowing better than me what I needed.

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